I can't believe I'm saying this, but I am SO excited to go back to work this week. I won't lie...I'll miss the days of sleeping in (who am I kidding, I never sleep in...) and lounging by the pool while Charley plays with her friends. But I am excited to get back into a routine! Charley needs the routine, too. I'm at my best when I'm busy, so I'm looking forward to getting moving again. And if I'm totally honest...this was one hell of a summer! It definitely had its highs and lows, and while I would say the positives absolutely outweighed the negatives, I'm kind of glad that it's over and my life can return to normal.
Charley starts school on Monday. I absolutely loved the preschool she was at toward the end of the year last year, but honestly, it was the Mercedes-Benz of daycares, and wasn't really in my budget. So, I found her a great little preschool close to our house. It's literally 2 miles away, the teachers are great, it's more affordable, and...here's the exciting part...I can go to the GYM before picking her up every day! I know that probably seems like a silly thing to be worked up about, but I really am. I like going to the gym, but haven't really been able to do it with a clear conscience for the last few months. I guess I just couldn't justify sending Charley to school all day, and then taking her to a different childcare at the gym. Now, the problem seems to be solved, and I'm so excited!
With school starting soon, I asked my mom to take Charley tonight, so I find myself with a night off. My dad took Oscar for the night, so I'm really only responsible for ME! And what did I do with my free time? Well, I did actually have some fun. I went shopping with a friend of mine, and although I intended to get clothes for school, I ended up with a couple of cute dresses and absolutely nothing that I'd intended on purchasing. Whoops! When I got home, though, I got to work cleaning. I steam-cleaned the carpets, which I seem to be doing compulsively lately (mostly because Oscar keeps feeling the need to mark his territory). It's actually gotten to be so bad, that when Charley and I were at the open house at her new school, she picked up the toy vacuum and announced, "I'm steam cleaning the carpets." I'm so glad she let her new teachers in on my obsessive carpet cleaning. That's definitely the first impression I wanted to leave. Ha! Anyway, it's my night off, and I'm cleaning the house. I'm not going to lie, the peace and quiet is kind of nice!
This post is kind of scattered. Sorry about that...I just have a bunch of little blurbs I wanted to include, and they seem to be coming to me in no particular order. Yesterday, I texted one of my closest friends, while I was at the park. She's a full-time single mom, too, so we have a lot in common. We've spent many hours talking about how our lives are different from most parents...even single parents...because we have our kids full-time. Which means our lives are totally kid-centered. It's interesting... I really don't know many full-time single moms. I actually know more full-time single dads, which is kind of odd. Anyway, I mentioned how I was at the park with Charley, and all of the other adults there were men. Dads, playing with their kids. Totally engaged, following their kids around, playing ball, sliding down the slides, pushing their kids on the swings. They were good dads. They weren't putting on a show. They were simply having fun with their kids. They were playing with my kid, too! Charley's a total social butterfly, and is generally drawn to men about my age. To me, it was beautiful. When I told her about it, she agreed. It was beautiful.
The same friend texted me today, and told me about an ex-boyfriend of hers, who keeps texting her about the bonding he's doing with his kids. It seems that every time he's with his kids, he feels the need to let her know about it. Naturally, it annoys her. It's one of the reasons things didn't work out between them. Although he always said that family came first to him, his actions spoke differently, and when he WAS spending time with his kids, he always seemed to need a pat on the back. My response via text was something along the lines of, "If a man constantly feels the need to tell you what a great dad he is, he's probably not that great." All of this talk brought me back to the days when I first re-entered the dating world. I was talking to a guy, and he made mention of how he was going to lunch at his daughter's school the next day. "That's so great!" I responded. "Why?" he asked. "Well...it's just a really nice thing for you to do," I replied. His response to me was perfect. "I'm her dad," he said. That was it. Simple, and to the point. He was doing what a dad who had the day off SHOULD do, and didn't expect any recognition for it. That statement showed me quite a lot about him, and his values. Fast forward about a year, and I was dating a different guy for a short time. We had a conversation that started out almost exactly the same way. "I'm bringing lunch to my daughter's school tomorrow," he said. "That's really great," I said. This is where it went south...Over the next three days, I received at least 6 messages about how he'd gone to lunch with his daughter. It was like he found something he knew I liked, and had to keep reminding me what a great dad he was. The thing is, the more he did that, the more I began to question his motivation. Was he going to lunch to spend time with his daughter? Or to be able to tell the world that he brought his daughter lunch? Now, I'm hoping that he really was going for his daughter's benefit, but the fact that he had to keep reiterating what a great dad he was...well... that was really irritating. I'm a big believer in the idea that actions speak louder than words. Show me you're a good parent, don't tell me about it. Show me you're a good person. The dads I saw at the park? They were SHOWING that they were good parents, making the most of their time with their children. Again, beautiful.
So, there really was no specific theme to this post. The product of a long summer, I suppose. On that note, have a great week!
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